The Scheming Spanish Barber

Hello, my little mince-pies. It seems I can’t keep my hands away from the laptop to check how my website is doing, so I thought to myself,

Why not make another blog post?

FIIIGAROOOOOOOO.

Did you know that Figaro was a “scheming Spanish barber”?

Regardless, I feel the need to vent some frustration on the poor, unassuming populace of my kindly viewers, rather than my parents, so, here goes. I am about to enter the fearsome arena of…university life. I have just completed my schooling and have decided to move to another country to pursue my higher studies. And if you know me, you know two things.

First, is that I am not particularly fond of change (yes, I know, it’s inevitable and change is constant but it’s one thing to say it and another to fully believe it and adopt it as one’s motto in going about the spectacle of life). Allow me to explain. Since I’ve been able to remember, I have almost always travelled with one of my, or my friends’, parents  driving me around, or on a school bus my parents paid for, or with relatives, escorting me from one place to the next. It is only recently that I have made trips anywhere, on public transport, without any familiar faces accompanying me. And if this “travelling alone” thing were a food item, I’d be allergic to it. Because, really, I could launch into verse while describing my myriad fears. There’s the possibility, surely, that the person driving the cab were a serial killer, particularly fond of teenage girls (Are there any non-teenage-girl-obssesed serial killers at all?). If nothing else, at least a Final Destination part 34 is unfolding in my head.

Second, is that I’m at least slightly/partially/selectively deaf. I even went and got it checked at the clinic. Apparently, one ear is very minimally less equipped for hearing purposes. It’s the butt of many inside jokes among my friends, whose infernal temperament encourages them to pursue it at length.

Example:

Friend: Hear comes the Queen, dressed in Queen clothes
*here
I wasn’t mocking your ear, I promise
Me: Asshole **laughs**
Friend:You mean earhole?

So that’s it for today! Let me know if you think you may be becoming deaf as well- if not, let me know if you like mince pies.

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